King Traducer

This is a short story that will never see the light of day about a King named Traducer who was a vicious tyrant. He had the technology of a nuclear weapon that was given to him in a dream that was so real to him, that he thought it was his guardian angel who explained to him how to develop the weapon that would help him rule the world. He didn’t believe it was God who gave him this knowledge because he wasn’t blessed with the manhood of a king and he blamed God for not being well in doubt which bothered him greatly. This is why he pretended to be very particular with women and ruled his kingdom without a queen and avoided women after one conversation or all together. King Traducer had to find a way to use this weapon on all his enemies all at once from the air so, he summoned his military general to a meeting to figure out the best way to deliver such a campaign. As he waited, he ate and as he would usually talk out loud to himself, his female servant heard his problem and she accidentally blurted out, “ I would just bury them” and she instantly fell to her knees and plead for her life and mercy from King Traducer. But he was so impressed and mesmerized at once by this servant girls flawless strategy, he rose from his throne and threw himself at her position of worship on the floor and said, “What is your name my new military council” and she looked into his eyes which were a sad blue with a gold corona around it and said, “Are you joking your highness?” King Traducer told her how serious he was and told her he would find her after he relieved his present military council from the meeting after implementing her strategy. So, he and his military council developed a campaign to send five S.N.O.B. teams (Stationary Nuclear Order Bomb) to each of the last five enemies he had and bury each nuclear bomb under the ground where his last five enemies ruled. The very next day at exactly 3:00 am, all five bombs went off and King Traducer became the very first leader of the planet freeing every slave from bondage, evaporating every border, eliminating the monetary systems, and replacing it with free trading and implementing a global peace policy with equality applications as the law. The next day he went looking for the servant girl to relieve her from bondage and add her to his military. He had no urge to be with this woman because he built such a thick wall of doubt and embarrassment around the fact that his junk wasn’t huge. As he approached the servant quarters where everyone was either packing for freedom or already starting their quest for a utopian society, he could see her and one of the girls said “He must have a Kings Staff” and she said “I know but I just want to have his eyes and his child.” King Traducer is furious and stops at the tree just beyond their field of view and ejaculates onto a fig leaf. He then folds up the leaf and darts towards her and they see him coming with a displeased look on his face and when he reaches their location he opens her hand and says, “Here’s my seed and he’ll have my eyes, now go fuck yourself” and he walks away in doubt knowing no matter what, equality will never exist. He then becomes the world’s most hidden yet generous King that ever existed but his loneliness and depression was so great that he would sometimes be contacted by God in his solace and they would discuss how to better the Kingdom of Earth and his lack of pride. Eventually, years later he is met by the woman he gave his seed to out of anger never thinking anything of it and sees her son who is the spitting image of him and they unite making the King finally happy to be alive and he accepts the woman into his life along with his full grown son and Gods Earth finally becomes his Heaven.

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